BREAKING: Yesterday terror reigned supreme in my Ohio Valley as a Canadian threatened to blow up the plane he was in over the WV, OH, PA tri-state area. The map below shows the flight path of the bomber's plane...
Two American fighter jets accompanied Sunwing Flight
772 from West Virginia back to Toronto after Ali Shahi,
25, became agitated and started ranting about his home
country. Incredible video footage shows a SWAT team
board the airplane on the tarmac and order the 183
passengers to get down as the plane is cleared...See
As you can clearly see; the plane flew directly over my city, then was diverted north over my old farm on the WV, PA border. Clearly I was being targeted!
I had not yet launched my fleet of drones with which to film the drama going on overhead. Neither did I have time to access my secret satellite control base in order to monitor the action in real time.
Ali Shahi was protesting high Canadian taxes, so was he a member of the Muslim branch of the Extermist Canuck Tea Party sent to destroy the Union controlled capitalist manufacturing hub of the Ohio Valley?
Clearly there is a conspiracy afoot here!
US officials stated that they were surprised by the strong response of the Canadian response team.
OBAMA WAS NOT IMMEDIATELY AVAILABLE FOR COMMENT, AS HE WAS RUSHED TO THE SECRET THRONE ROOM IN THE WHITE HOUSE BUNKER.
Disclaimer notice for the uninformed masses;
FOR SATIRICAL USE ONLY!
No Canadians were killed or harmed in any way during the writing of this post.