Saturday, June 7, 2014

June Democrat Politician Horoscopes


Aries A good way to use children as props for any leftist project you are looking to promote, Global War...errr Climate Change is a good one. Hug the children as you sell their futures to Socialism and suck their souls from them.



Taurus 
Discuss how to steal err.. redistribute 
income from the middle class with your caucus 
by using class warfare to justify your zeal to 
destroy hope.  Tonight: keep your manicure 
scissors nearby in case your mistress gets her 
braces caught in your hair again.

Gemini Practice saying into a mirror: "I just 
found out about it on TeeVee" Then check on 
the progress of your shredding crew.

Cancer Sad thoughts may bedevil you today. 
Clear them out of your head by thinking of 
destroying capitalism. Tonight: party like it's 
Kim Jong Un Day.


Leo Take time to ignore the deaths in Benghazi 
and craft legislation restricting access to 
Benghazi documents. Tonight: clean your bong 
without checking to see if there's a hit in the 
chamber because your kids wouldn't smoke 
your shit.

Virgo A good day to lawyer up. Not that you did 
anything wrong! Still, a very, very good day to 
lawyer up. Tonight: practice saying "a sacred 
duty" in the mirror.

Libra Accuse your opponents of playing the 
blame game. When they accuse you of playing 
the blame game by accusing them of playing the 
blame game, feign chest pains until they 
apologize. Then start playing the blame-them-for
-your-chest-pains game.

Scorpio Replenish your campaign coffers by 
sending out a fundraising email defending a cop 
killer because hey, he's a communist, we gots to 
stand together! Add a P.S. suggesting he should 
get into politics.

Sagittarius Replenish your campaign coffers by 
sending out a fundraising email accusing a 
conservative TV personality of saying things you 
disagree with, and insisting that he shut up!
Add a P.S. suggesting he should stay out of politics.

Capricorn Today you'll get the urge to express 
your opposition to legal immigration by accusing 
anyone opposing illegal immigration of racism. 
If someone voices skepticism, call them a racist.

Aquarius Count your blessings as a Democrat, 
such as unfettered love and adoration from the 
media, newspapers, periodicals and supporting 
Hollywood movies that allows you to get away 
with lies, murder and keeping "the constituency"
 poor and voting for you. Tonight: Block access 
to a National Monument for veterans just for fun.

Pisces Don’t take no for an answer. Give no for 
an answer. The 5th amendment is your and your 
friends friend.

HEY DEMOCRAT; WHAT'S YOUR SIGN?

OH THAT'S RIGHT...DUH...

From...Mike Miles

2 comments:

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

That's their sign.

Scott Way said...

The Party of the People Odie...yeah right...